Monday, February 20, 2012

One step closer...

I know this is going to sound pretty ridiculous, but I'm actually excited about getting fingerprinted tomorrow... Ok, before you think I've completely lost it, let me try to explain:). I realized that I was feeing really antsy/anxious this evening and couldn't figure out why. I found myself trying to stay busy this evening-trying out a new sewing project on a whim (which I failed at:(, walking quickly from room to room as I picked things up in the house, and, what should have been the dead giveaway: shining my sink. I don't know what it is about shining my sink, but I can usually tell something is on my mind when I start scrubbing away at the kitchen sink. (Seriously, if you've never "shined your sink" you need to give it a try!) At any rate, it hit me all of a sudden: we're getting fingerprinted tomorrow. I'm not sure how, but we totally overlooked this step of the paperwork process (I now remember them talking about it in orientation, but it must have gotten buried underneath the 100 other necessary documents.) DH was speaking with someone at our agency last week, and they brought up how they can't really move further until our fingerprinting is processed. So, I got online and got the earliest appointment we could! Anyway, I guess I found myself getting really worked up because even though this is one of the little steps in this process, it still is just that-one more little step closer in this process...which means we will be one more little step closer to meeting our baby and their birthmommy. So, I can't help but be anxious and excited for tomorrow, because that puts me one day closer to holding our baby in my arms... ... Dear Birthmother...I found myself having a really difficult time going to sleep last night. I laid in bed for hours, tossing and turning and feeling so unsettled. I couldn't figure out why I couldn't sleep...but then you came to my mind. I found myself praying for you and the baby you may already be carrying in your belly. You are already so much a part of our lives even though we have no idea who each other is. We are committed to praying for you though, and we can't wait to get to know you!

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