Saturday, June 15, 2013

Father's Day 2013

I have to be honest...Father's Day always stings just a little bit.  It reminds me of one of the very last conversations I had with my Daddy.  DH and I were in our car, on our way to Springfield for lunch after church.  I had called to wish Daddy a happy Father's Day, and I remember him saying,  

"Didn't you have a birthday recently, too?"

Daddy was never very good about remembering to wish me a happy birthday or even remembering when my birthday actually was.  He only came to two of my piano recitals and a couple of drama performances.  There were many days I would go without seeing him because he worked from sunup until late into the evening pretty much every day of the week.  And even though it hurt not to have him there for things important to me, I knew my dad's way of showing love to me was by trying to provide for me and my family so that we WERE able to do those things we enjoyed.  I've been thankful that God has given me that perspective, because while I certainly have cried many tears over time missed with my Daddy, I've never doubted that he loved me.  I remember that Father's Day conversation 6 years ago well--he was asking me about how my pregnancy was going and if DH and I had picked out baby furniture yet.  I'm sure he gave his signature laugh (he had SUCH a great chuckle!) over something at some point in the conversation, too:)  Oh how I miss that laugh... and the other thing I miss, which is going to sound strange at first, is getting to buy him his yearly Father's Day card.  Each year I would go in search of the "perfect" card for him (which wasn't easy) and mail it to him, and when I would come home for a visit and go to his office, he would have them proudly displayed on his mantle.  So each year when Father's Day rolls around, I always tear up a bit when I go by the card asile.  I can't help but glance over the "Daddy from daughter" ones wondering which one I would have picked for him.  And then I stop and realize that even though it hurts so badly to not have him with me, I am blessed that there is another man in my life that I can celebrate on this day: Lucy and Gabriel's Daddy!

One of the things I love so much about my husband is the amazing Daddy that he is.  While he works hard to provide for our family, his job is not his number one priority.  In no way am I trying to be negative about my own daddy-I truly believe that he loved in the best way that he knew how to love, and I am so grateful that he was my daddy, but the things that I missed out so much with my daddy are things I am so thankful that my husband makes a priority with his family.  I love how Lucy begs to climb her Daddy's neck like a monkey as he goes to tuck her into bed; I love how Gabriel's face lights up when his Daddy enters the room; I love to watch the way DH loves, cherishes, and challenges our children.  He reminds them constantly of his love for them, and he encourages them at their levels to strive to be all God has for them to be in life.  He is SUCH an amazing Daddy, and I am SUCH a blessed woman to have him as the father to my children:)

So on this Father's Day, I honor two very special daddies in my life: I honor the man I was blessed to call MY daddy for 25 years, and I honor the man who has blessed my children's lives by being their daddy.  And the reason I honor them is not to try and put them on a lofty pedastool, but I honor them because they have each made an impact on my life that continually draws me closer to my HEAVENLY Father.  

You see, even though my daddy would probably tell you he didn't have a very personal walk with Christ, his life caused me to draw closer in MY personal walk with Christ as I daily would pour out my heart to the Lord to see my Daddy have that same desire to walk closely with Jesus.  I struggled in my faith after his death because I couldn't understand how my Daddy's death could be the answer to my years of prayer...but I was challenged in my walk that I serve a God that I can trust, even when life doesn't make sense, so through the questions, I chose to follow Him WITHOUT question...

And then there's my children's Daddy...while he isn't perfect (I always say his one fault is that he doesn't like chocolate;-), he maintains a daily walk with the Lord and allows Him to guide his steps and the steps of our family.  It is such a privlege to have him as the spiritual leader of our household, it is an honor to submit to his authority over our family, and it is a blessing to serve alongside of him as a wife, a parent, and a minister of the Gospel.  All of the things that I missed so much from my Daddy growing up are things that come so naturally to my husband.  In some ways, I feel like God purposely and graciously made DH to be that way so that I might experience those things that I missed out so much on from my own Daddy.

So today, I say thank you to my daddy and to my childern's daddy. Thank you so much for drawing me closer to my Heavenly Daddy.  Oh, how loved you are, and oh how blessed I am!
 Here's a link to a slideshow my brother put together and I performed and recorded the song for it...

Happy Father's Day everyone--never miss out on an opportunity to say how much you love the Dads in your life...

No comments:

Post a Comment