Today...

There are days when the beds get made and non-workout clothes or pajamas get put on as soon as everyone wakes up. 

There are days when the kitchen and living room are tidy and untouched with the first light of day. 

There are days when I get to drink my coffee while it's still hot. 

There are days when I write special notes to my DH on his coffee mug and put funny jokes on Lucy's orange in her lunch box. 

There are days when I get dinner started at lunch time and have it setting out on the table as soon as DH gets home. 

(Ok...maybe that last one doesn't happen hardly ever these days!)

There are days when diapers get changed before blowouts happen, and nobody throws a fit over having to lay still long enough so that the contents don't go flying out over the sheets you just changed yesterday. 

There are days when bed time happens at a decent hour and kids fall asleep with no fuss, where DH and I have a few moment together to discuss our day and pray together and dream together. 

And then there are days like today.

Days when not one single bed in the entire house get made, including the self-made ones on the couch from a big sister who was sick all day...

Days when you spend almost every free moment you have washing dishes and picking up toys and yet the kitchen and living room are still a disaster when everyone goes to bed... 

Days when you find your 3/4 full cup of coffee still sitting at the breakfast table at dinner time...

Days when you'd love to take a moment to do something special for each member of your family, but you're pulled in so many different directions that you can't even find a moment to think anything other than what time which person got what medicine and when do they need another dose, and was it Tylenol or ibuprofen that you last gave, and did Gabriel get both doses of his antibiotic and did Lucy eat before hers and did Annie still have fever or was it DH, and where did Gabriel hide the thermometer...

Days when dinner is re-heated leftover soup or microwaved hot dogs, or waffles-gone-wrong, and the fizz from DH's ice drink explodes out all over the sink when you try to help him with it...

Days when the dirty diapers seems endless because of side effects from antibiotics, and your babies are crying because they hurt, and everyone is screaming for your attention at the same time, and there's just not enough of you to go around...

Days when bedtime isn't anywhere near when it's supposed to be because nap times were all over the place and sick children are fussy, and instead of having time to talk with DH you just collapse into  your recliner to stare mindlessly at a game on your phone to try and turn your brain off from reminding you of all the ways you could have been a better mommy today, a better wife, a better friend, a better daughter...and just as you get ready to drift off to sleep, DH's cough reverberates through the house up into the girls' room, jolting a scared Annie Beth from her sleep. (And you certainly aren't mad at DH for coughing-you want to cry that he's hurting and now she's hurting, too...) So you pick up your baby and rock her, and your heart starts to break a bit, because it feels like there's just not much you can do to make any of it better. 

Today.  

Today has been one of "those" days...

Today, every single one of my precious family members is in need of some relief, and I am feeling pretty weary...And a part of me feels guilty for even feeling weary, when I think of my fellow brothers and sisters in the faith who are being persecuted, who are watching their loved ones die, who are desperate for a relief far beyond coughs or fever or constant infections or lack of sleep...

But then my Heavenly Father reminds me that He cares for me...He cares for my personal needs in this present moment: Today. My needs may seem so much smaller and more trivial, but yet He is able to care for my needs while He cares for theirs, too. 

As I was changing Annie's diaper today, and she was crying, I could hear Gabriel crying for me in the other room, and I could see Lucy's face flush with fever needing another dose of medicine, and I could hear DH coughing and needing his prescriptions picked up from the pharmacy...all I could do in that moment was finish changing Annie's diaper--I had to choose one task before I could move on to another. And then as I sat Annie down to help someone else, her cries continued because she wanted my undivided attention. 

I wasn't enough for everyone today.

But my Jesus, He is always more than enough!  While my abilities are limited, His grace and mercy flow endlessly.  He doesn't look down upon us and pick and choose which needs are the greatest, because He truly cares for each and every one of our needs, and it is my prayer that though this flesh will fail my precious family, that they will see that my God within me will NEVER fail them. His grace is enough, His mercies are new, and His love is overflowing, 

today.

And every day.