Thursday, September 20, 2012

God's orchestration of blessings...

Gabriel snuggling in bed with Daddy
Gabriel slept from around 11pm until 6AM this morning!  I couldn't believe it!  I got up and fed him and then he went back to sleep...well, except that when I swaddled him and put him back in his pack n play he woke up, so I knew what he was wanting, so I laid him in our bed next to his daddy.  We tend to let him sleep with us after his morning feeding and he takes the BEST morning nap.  It makes me think of my struggle with insomina--I have such a horrible time being able to rest well, mostly because there's always so much on my mind and I can't seem to shut it all down so that I can rest.  But, when I allow myself to calm down and feel secure in all that's going on in life, I usually sleep much better.  I think it's the same with Gabriel--he feels secure next to his mommy and daddy, so he sleeps well snuggled closely next to us:)  (Not to mention I'm sure our mattress is WAY more cushy!  lol:)

Lucy before school today
Because I was up early, I decided to go ahead and fire up the keurig and have my quiet time before getting Lucy up for school.  Most of you know that I am NOT a morning person, but every now and then I find that I do enjoy the stillness of an early morning, and today was one of those days.  I love sitting at our table with a cup of coffee and my devotional books, eager to hear whatever the Lord has to speak to me.  As I was finishing up writing in my journal, my sweet girl woke up (Another reason I don't get up earlier than I "have" to is because Lucy is probably the lightest sleeper in the world!  Even if I'm just sitting in the other room reading, she somehow knows I'm up and will wake up, too.  She just doesn't want to miss ANYthing!) and crawled in my lap.  My heart felt so full this morning as I realized I had gotten such sweet snuggles with my baby boy earlier, and now my precious daughter was curled up in my lap, too.  She then started asking me what I was doing, and we had a little conversation.  I was brought back to those sweet memories of rocking her in the wee hours of the morning (well, AND the late hours of the night, and pretty much all of the other hours of the day, too! LOL)    Of course, I miss those precious moments, but I also treasure the present moments, because now my baby girl is growing, and that means I can experience even more things with her, like our sweet little conversations, which is actually what I had been journaling about just before she had woken up...
Lucy before school yesterday (that should say Day 18)

After Lucy got home from school yesterday and took a little nap (Wednesdays are team kid night, so I try to get her to take a nap after school.  I know it's late in the day for a nap, but that is quite a long day for a little girl!) I had a praise baby DVD in for Gabriel and she started watching it with him.  She started asking different questions stemming from the praise songs she was hearing (I absolutely LOVE those DVDS!) and asked "Why did God make snakes if they're bad?"  I'll admit, I had to stop for a minute and ask myself the same question!  LOL  But I answered her with something like this: "Lucy, God has a purpose for EVERYTHING He created, but sometimes the Devil tries to make evil out of what God meant for good."

As I began my quiet time this morning, the devotional seemed to center around those same thoughts.  I was reminded how the Devil truly "roams around like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour."  (1 Peter 5:8)  But my prayer is that I can have enough faith to see past his schemes and to trust my Heavenly Father who is able to make all things beautiful again in His time.  The devotional I read this morning (journey) closed today's entry with this:
"God can use painful things of our fallen world for good.  We can trust Jesus completely when we walk through difficult trials.  Remember that He sees the whole picture while we hold a mere piece of the puzzle in our hand.  We can not see the ways God intends to use our trial for good or the miraculous blessings He can bring out of it, but we can experience His mercies every day.  They are new every morning (Lamentations 3:23.)"

When I think of this concept of God bringing "beauty from the ashes," so many things come to my mind, but the most recent one is my son.  While I don't think Gabriel's birthmother ever considered abortion, I know that so often women who are in a bad or difficult situation will choose to have an abortion, rather than choosing life for their baby.  Our world so easily forgets though that the child is the most wonderful blessing we could ever receive.  Why would we take away away the most beautiful gift we could be given, even if it is born out of something that is difficult?  Children are TRULY a blessing:
Gabriel yesterday, loving on his sophies
"When a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world."John 16:21 ESV
"Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward." Psalm 127:3 ESV 
It might have been easier at the time for Gabriel's birthmother to choose an abortion when she realized she wouldn't be able to take care of him, but instead, she made the selfless decision to choose LIFE for him.  I told someone today how it has been almost five years since Lucy entered our lives and over twelve weeks since Gabriel was born, but I still find myself sitting back in amazement over how God has orchestrated this incredible gift we get to call our family.  Both of our children are miracles in different ways, and both were born out of heartache in different ways--Lucy came after a time of great trials and difficultly in our lives as we had gone through DH being diagnosed with cancer and then the tremendous loss of my father.  Lucy's birth breathed new life into our family and reminded us how God brings beauty into our life even in the midst of pain.  And then Gabriel came into our lives after a very long road of struggling to grow our family, and after I'm sure what was a time of great struggle for his birthmother as well.  But with his birth brought joy and again the reminder of new life. 

I pray I never take for granted the great gift we have been given in our family.  We are truly blessed in so many ways, and I am so thankful I get to see the evidence of that every day in the faces of my Lucy Shea and Gabriel Paul!

"God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure." Ephesians 1:5

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