Saturday, February 9, 2013
Seeing the hand of God in my life...
I was on pinterest last night and saw something a friend posted on her adoption board, and I immediately just fell in LOVE with the quote. The basic gist was this: You may not look like me, but what I am able to see in you is so much more beautiful, because when I look at you, I see the hand of God in my life.
That so describes how I feel about our precious Gabriel Paul! He is a living, breathing example of Jesus' power and provision and so much more! When I look at him, I know without a doubt that HE is the child our hearts were yearning for. And while I would love to experience the joys of pregnancy and expanding our family even further, I would not ever trade having our precious son for that experience. When he hears my voice and looks around the room for me, or when he gives me a humongous grin when I go to pick him up out of his crib, or when he reaches for me, puts his sweet chubby hands on my face, or lays his precious head on my shoulder so I can snuggle him...my heart just melts! And then to listen to Lucy talk about her baby brother...what a JOY to see how much your children love another! I don't really even know how to put it into words, but they just have such a special bond. I'm at my mom's house this weekend (I had to leave yesterday morning, so Lucy stayed with Daddy so she wouldn't miss school. We are kind of in trouble because she's missed so much from being so sick this school year.) and I talked with Lucy on the phone this morning. She said, "Tell Gabriel I love him and I miss him!" My mommy heart isn't just full from having my son, but Lucy's heart is full, too from getting to have a baby brother. What a blessing to see her take her role so seriously and blossom even more from having him in her life!
The friend who originally pinned the quote I opened this blogpost with is the one who told us about CHFS, and we started our journeys at just about the same time. It's crazy to think how when she was sitting at our "annual ball" telling me abut CHFS, little did any of us know that HER SON had just been born the day before. Their precious Parker is still in South Korea, but we are all anxiously awaiting for him to get to come home! I know I cannot fully imagine the anguish of not being able to have your baby with you, but God does. He knows exactly how they feel, and He is going to see them through this period of waiting...and bless them along the way. You see, after GP's last checkup, I had been texting with Kursten and found out they had just recently gotten an update on Parker. I shared with her what GP's measurements were, and...THEY WERE EXACTLY THE SAME AS PARKER'S! I'm talking height, weight, and even the size of their heads! I just couldn't believe it at first...but then I just had to stop and smile as I realized it wasn't a coincidence, but a precious little gift from God. I immediately told her, "You have GOT to hold Gabriel!" I mean, of course I know it's not the same thing as holding her son, but since he is not physically here for them to love on, I just thought what a sweet blessing from God to be able to love on a baby that has the exact same measurements as her own precious son. So, that following Sunday, Kursten came and scooped Gabriel up during the Sunday School hour and loved on him, and he fell asleep in her arms:)
I know we should never be surprised at how God chooses to bless us, but I mostly pray I will just never take it for granted. Adoption has taught me SO many things, but one of the greatest things has definitely been seeing the hand of God in my life. I am so very thankful for that and blessed because of that!